Living Love & Logic Tip #81

Janice felt her face getting hot. She was certain every customer in the grocery store was staring and judging. She swore she could feel every adult urging her to "do something about that little brat." For some reason, this perceived pressure made Janice much angrier than if her daughter had acted out in private. When they got to the car, Janice lost her cool.

When she got home and told her husband, Bill, he felt pressure too. His beloved wife had been embarrassed in public and he couldn't put up with that.

Fortunately for their daughter, neither Janice nor Bill became abusive, but they did both react more harshly than usual.

Are adults affected by peer pressure too? Do we allow our fear of what others think to make us lose our cool?

Many parents have told us they have a harder time staying calm when the school, the neighbors, or especially strangers are exposed to their kids' misbehavior - and the adults are exposed to humiliation.

Wise parents realize that all kids are going to have their moments and some of those moments are bound to be witnessed by others. These wise adults remember that their ultimate goal is to raise great kids - not to impress the neighbors. This helps them view kids' mistakes as learning opportunities and resist the urge to overreact and do something right now.

Wise adults also have a plan for staying calm when they get frustrated with their kids and practice responses before they find themselves ranting and raving. They take steps to set themselves up for success when things get intense.

In our practical audio Keeping Cool When Parenting Heats Up, we share real, proactive things that people can do to stay calm when kids cause frustration. This audio has helped countless adults stay calm and avoid reactions they later would regret.

Thanks for reading! Our goal is to help as many families as possible. If this is a benefit, forward it to a friend.

Jedd Hafer
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