LIVING LOVE AND LOGIC TIP #20

Love and Logic Alternatives to Saying "No"
Weekly Tip from the Love and Logic^® Experts

 

When I advise parents about saying "no," I tell them the same thing I tell adolescents who might be considering some self-destructive act: "You can always do that, so let's try other things first."

• Give a choice and imply consequences: "Gee, I don't think that is a very good decision and I'm pretty sure it might work out poorly for you."

• Suggest an alternative behavior without ordering it: "I think that if I were in your shoes, I would probably change my tone of voice rather than being asked to leave."

• Ask for illumination (without using a witness stand tone of voice): "I've always wondered about what leads kids to be obnoxious. Can you help me understand that?"

• Give a direct question: "How do you think this is going to work out for you?"

Remember, Love and Logic has nothing against telling a kid "no." However, that means the response has not been clearly thought through. If we can say something that gets the kid to make his own decision, we are further ahead.

 

LIVING LOVE AND LOGIC TIP #19

Why saying, "Just try it, it's easy" isn’t a good idea.
Weekly Tip from the Love and Logic^® Experts

Has someone ever said to you, "Just try it, it's easy!" and then you found-out the task they coaxed you into trying was painfully difficult? Did this leave you feeling exceptionally capable or downright stupid…and  embarrassed?

 

When this happens to the average adult, it doesn't take long for them to conclude two things:

• This person who's trying to help me is nuts…and definitely not to be trusted!

• Why should I try if I can't even handle the easy stuff?

Quite frequently I overhear well-meaning parents and educators using the "Just try it, it's easy!" approach in an attempt to urge a reluctant child into trying something they're afraid of. When the child finds the task easy, all is right with the world. When they don't, they're confronted with the pain of seeing that they might be so slow that they can't even do something really, really "easy"!

 

How often does this need to happen before our kids lose faith in our word? How often does this have to happen before our children lose faith in their own abilities? Are you willing to take this sort of risk with your kids?

 

In my book, From Bad Grades to a Great Life!, I teach a far safer approach. Experiment with asking your child:

 

A lot of kids find this kind of challenging. Would you try this and let me know what you think?

 

If you hear, "It's too hard. I can't do it," smile, pat them on the back and ask:

 

Aren't you glad that I don't believe that?

 

"Aren't you glad that I don't believe that?" represents an exceptionally powerful way of communicating to your children that they have what it takes to succeed. Delivered in question format its effectiveness becomes supercharged. Remember: Questions create thinking. Statements create resistance.

 

You may also experiment with asking another question:

 

And…aren't you glad that I'm going to love you the same even if you have to work really hard to figure this out?

LOOK WHO'S COOKING!

     In cooking class we used our 5 senses to discover a pineapple. We decided it was healthy a food. We discussed how much it weighs in comparison to a feather. Then we weighed ourselves and compared which one weighs more. We discussed where they grow. We learned that it takes 18 mos to grow a pineapple and only one at a time grows on each bush type plant....making them more expensive per pound. We observed the pineapple plant Ms. JoAnn showed Brodee Bear in So. Carolina (where Ms JoAnn's grandchildren Naomi and Noah moved to). We observed our collection of coins and identified which ones were quarters. If we spent all quarters it would take approximately 16 quarters to buy a 1 lb pineapple.

NV Pre K Standard Life Science- L.PK.4 5 senses:
Use 5 senses to explore and investigate the natural world

NV Pre K standard Health (HE)-
1.PK.3 identify Healthy Food

Nv Pre K standard math(M)-
3.PK.1 compare objects by size to determine smaller and larger

Nv pre K standard Geography (G)
G7.PK.1 begin to understand that people move to other places.

Nv Pre K Standard Math (M)
M3.PK.4 sort pennies and nickels

NV PreK Standard social studies/ economics (EC)
Ec 10.PK.1 demonstrate the role of consumers and understand that money is exchanged for goods and/or services.

Growing up!

41.2 Lbs and is 44 3/4 ".

41.2 lbs and is 44.5" tall.

 
  This past week we have been working with measurements; different measuring tools, different things to measure and different measuring systems. Students loved learning about their growing bodies. Students used a scale to find out their weight and then used a ruler to determine their height. They organized and recorded this data to be used for later discussion and activities.

     It was fun to see the growth that several students have had throughout the year. This student has been with HO4K for several years so he was able to predict how many inches he has grown since last summer. After predicting we learned that he has grown 2 3/4" in just a little over a year! Wow!

 41.2 lbs and is 45" tall

     After all students were measured and weighed we compared the sizes of friends. Students moved into order; light, medium, heavy, more than, less than or the same, short, medium tall or big, bigger, biggest etc. We can't wait to work more with measurement as we continue to track our growth and grow into "BIG KIDS!"

NV Kindergarten (K) standards addressed:

*Math 2.PK.1 Sort objects by similar attributes (e.g., size, shape, color, etc.)

*Math 5.PK.1 Identify and sort information.

*Math 3.K.1 Compare, order, and describe objects by size.

LIVING LOVE AND LOGIC TIP #18

Saved by One Letter
Weekly Tip from the Love and Logic^® Experts


 

      Judy saved her own life. She used to listen when her kids argued with her. She used to fall for their manipulation. When her teen daughter said, "You love Billy more than me!" she used to get upset and insist, "That's not true! I love you BOTH!"

   Now she takes better care of herself. When the arguing and manipulation start, Judy goes brain dead. She doesn't listen to the words lest she be tempted to do something dumb - like respond. Instead, Judy picked a brilliant sound to use when her kids attempt to push her buttons. The sound is "Mmmmm."It works with nearly any situation:

"You’re ruining my life!"

"Mmmmm."

"You think it's 1950 or something!"

"Mmmmm."

    Judy's life - or at least her sanity - is saved. She no longer gets roped into long, destructive fights with her kids. She no longer gets defensive or worn down. She just shuts her brain off, stops listening to the manipulative words, and repeats "Mmmmm."

    Her kids have no idea what to do - but they HAVE learned very quickly that when Mom goes into "Mmmmm mode," there's no use in arguing. They hardly even try anymore.

    For more great tips on using Love and Logic techniques to save your sanity, check out Love and Logic Magic When Kids Leave You Speechless

* WOW could it be really this easy?!?! Weekly challenge: oractice being "brain dead" when your little one is pushing your buttons! : )

New Preschool Standards

The state of Nevada has recently revised the Nevada Pre-Kindergarten standards. This is a complied list of learning objectives that provide a framework for curriculum and instruction at the pre-kindergarten level. As parents it is very important that we are aware of the learning that is to be taking place with our little ones. At HO4K, all of the state standards are discussed, addressed and practiced with the students. Many activities actually address several of the standards for pre-K learning. Frequently the new state pre-K standards will be listed under the description and pictures on the blog throughout the week. This will help you to be aware of what your child is doing, the reasons we are doing certain activities and where your child's learning ability should be upon completing preschool. Please take a moment to review these standards yourself as it is extremely informative and even offers ideas on how to cover concepts to help your child understand a concept. The new Nevada Pre-Kindergarten standards can be found HERE!

Growing Avocados

Its planting time again! When trying to help children learn about responsibility, planting is a great concept. Many might be confused by that statement, but when planting, children are required to work hard to create the perfect environment for the plants to flourish, the plants need to be cared for and watered frequently and students need to be aware of the condition of the growing plant.

At HO4K we have germinated our own avocado seeds for 6 weeks in a wet paper towel inside a closed container. See our past post about how we germinated our avocado seeds here.

. We are now ready to put one seed in soil and one in water to grow plants. Students have researched and have learned that all living things need air,water, food and sunshine.

The more we work with plants, the more students realize that we have the same basic needs.
 We have worked together to create a nourishing environment for our seeds in hopes that they will grow strong and healthy just like us!

F IS FOR FUN!

F-F-F-FLYING!

This week students worked on the letter F. There were many activities but the favorite hands down was the flying swing! Students took turns waiting patiently and reading their names off of a list to participate. Once safety rules were discussed, students were harnessed in and flying! Many skills were learned and reinforced from this activity. For starters, students used their bodies and large motor skills to move the swing. This took practice of coordination and core body strength. Focusing on their upper body and self control, students maneuvered in different positions, practicing above, beside, next to, behind and over objects. This connects to the math concept of spatial relationships. When swinging students also discovered speed, motion, gravity and cause and effect. These science concepts are always fun to learn about, but we all agree that learning with our bodies is the best way!

Fun is just a consequence of attending Hand-On-4-Kids preschool!

LIVING LOVE AND LOGIC TIP #17

When to RescueWeekly Tip from the Love and Logic^® Experts

The chapter in Parenting with Love and Logic emphasizes the importance of not rescuing kids from their mistakes. However, this is not an absolute. This does not apply when the matter has to do with loss of life or limb.

And there are some other times when I would be willing to rescue a child from a mistake. It really doesn't hurt to rescue a child who is usually quite respectful, appreciative, and responsible. It feels good to help out this kind of person and actually helps reinforce relationships.

Rescuing a demanding, unappreciative, and irresponsible person never feels good. And it does nothing to develop relationships and only reinforces irresponsibility.

Night out

Our First "Night out" is filling fast...
Reserve your space today!

Date: Friday, September 16, 2011
Time: 6pm-10pm
Cost: $20 per child ($15 each for the 2nd and 3rd etc.)
Includes: delicious AND nutritious dinner and evening snack

Send them in PJ's, have confidence in their safety and fun!

We are Looking forward to YOUR "Night Out" !! Contact me at your earliest convenience with RSVP, payment due by Wednesday, September 14, 2011. Don't forget!

Playing is so much fun!

This student models nice leadership skills as he calls kids to take turns crawling through the tunnel.

Friendships and relationships grow through playing and communicating with others. The children at HO4K are so lucky to be able to have so much fun playing each day.  Play helps younger children develop social skills, problem solving skills and also interpersonal skills.

 

Children are born with the innate talent and urge to learn new things through exploration and discovery.
HO4K ensures that children play with others as it is important because it helps in the emotional and social development, as well as in learning skills such as negotiation. Students are constantly learning the lessons of appropriate play, communication, sharing and give and take! Play is an integral part of learning and child development.

There are several different form of play. They are described as follows:

• Practical Play-exploring in sand or water, pounding on drums, etc.
• Constructive Play- building or constructing something using objects.
• Dramatic Play- Pretending to be someone, acting, creating a scenario, etc.
• Games with Rules- games with established rules, board games, competitive games, etc.



Some believe that children play too much and that an increase in organized academic learning is necessary. However, play is a learning time and in fact is detrimental to healthy child development. The children at HO4K get their healthy dose of play every day!

Read more at Suite101: The Importance of Play in Early Childhood Development | Suite101.com http://www.suite101.com/content/the-importance-of-play-in-early-childhood-development-a225507#ixzz1Wa664mFi

LIVING LOVE AND LOGIC TIP #16 and REMINDER

REMINDER!!!!

Our annual program and graduation ceremony will be taking place this FRIDAY night at 6:30. We would love to see you all there. Please RSVP to Mrs. JoAnn by Wednesday the 24th as to how many guests will be joining us so that we can be sure to have enough refreshments. We are excited to see our little ones performance and to celebrate our graduates! It is sure to be a fun time!

Now, for our weekly help!

Help! My Kids Will Only Eat Junk Food!

Weekly Tip from the Love and Logic^® Experts

Do you know any kids who choose junk over good food every chance they get? What can parents and caregivers do to steer kids toward healthier choices without becoming helicopter or drill sergeant parents?

 

Let's look at a few ideas from the Love and Logic menu:

• Provide a good example.
  Fortunately, we have control over the powerful example we set with food.

• Offer choices.
  Some adults find success in offering two good options and letting kids choose: "Would you like apples or carrot sticks for your snack?"

• Use enforceable statements.
  Many Love and Logic parents have found "go-to" enforceable statements beginning with these phrases: "I provide…, We provide…, We buy…" or "Feel free to…" For example: "We provide healthy snacks in our house. Feel free to buy other snacks with your allowance."

• Share the thinking.
  If unhealthy eating has become a problem, experiment with asking some loving questions such as: "What do you think you can do about this?" or "Can you think of some better ways to take care of your body?"

• Be prepared to neutralize arguing.
  When we start setting limits with food, our kids aren't going to thank us - especially at first. Wise parents are ready for the resistance with a handy one-liner. "I love you too much to argue" is my favorite.

For more tips on avoiding unwinnable power-struggles and arguments, listen to Avoiding Power Struggles with Kids.

Thanks for reading! Our goal is to help as many families as possible. If this is a benefit, forward it to a friend.

 

 

REVISITING BLOCK PLAY

Stages of Block Play

* Click on the BLOCK PLAY page on the right to see the complete description and more detail about block play!

STAGE 1- Blocks are carried around and are not used
in construction.

STAGE 2- Building begins. Rows are made either vertically
(stacking) or horizontally (on the floor). Destruction occurs.

 STAGE 3- Stage 3 involves a great deal of repetition,

but bridging also takes place. Bridging consists
of two blocks with a space between them,
connected by a third block.

 STAGE 4- Enclosures are constructed. Enclosures are four
blocks placed in such a way that they enclose
a space.

STAGE 5- Decorative patterns begin to appear. Much

symmetry is seen, but the structures are not
named yet.

STAGE 6- Structures are named for use in dramatic play.
The names relate to how the structure will
be used.

Look at our boat we made!

STAGE 7- Buildings often reproduce or symbolize actual
structures with which the children are familiar.
There is also a great deal of dramatic play around
the block structures.

Moving our bodies

Young children's future health and well-being are directly related to the development and strengthening of their bodies. There are many ways to move our bodies. Children need lots of movement both small (fine motor skills) and large (large motor skills). Of course using large motor movements help our little ones get their wiggles out and hopefully helps them sleep better at night!

Above, this student is working on pumping her legs to swing. This large motor movement is addressing the 4 major components of large muscle development: strengthening of the muscles, balance, coordination and muscle control. While participating  in this activity she is also experiencing spatial relations by feeling where she is in the space around her and her swing. At HO4K students are constantly moving and engaged in more than the minimum recommended 60 minutes of daily physical activity.  

Using our children's natural curiosity of touch and manipulation often help our students to practice using their fine motor skills. Below students are engaged in a simple activity that has them using both large motor skills and small. Anytime a student paints on a large scale, particularly on an easel, they are using their shoulders and hands (large) to paint as well as their fingers (small) to hold their brush. These skills demonstrate their improvement in muscle strength, dexterity, and control needed to manipulate items. Holding a paint brush is just another step in helping students learn how to properly pinch/hold an item which is a pre-writing skill.

These skills demonstrate improvement in muscle strength, dexterity, and control needed to manipulate items. Holding a paint brush is just another step in helping students learn how to properly pinch/hold an item which is a pre-writing skill.

Bye-Bye Banana!

Our changing banana experiment is nearing the end. The students have noticed the decaying banana is getting flat as liquid has been seeping out. Also noticeable is the sticky liquid on the fingers after handling the banana.

Students have been amazed as we near the end. We started with a beautiful, yummy, firm, yellow banana. What remains is far from it. Students have taken turns comparing what is left to what we started with. We also have been taking notice as the changes that are occurring seem to be similar to the actual peel and the banana itself inside. Their curiosity continues to grow at the thought of what could happen next? What will it look like tomorrow? What will be the end of our banana? Asking these open-ended questions and providing this time of reflection and exploration is so important when young children are investigating in science.

LIVING LOVE AND LOGIC TIP #15

One Evening in My Son's Home
Weekly Tip from the Love and Logic^® Experts
 

Choices are magic. My grandson, Ferris, was bemoaning the amount of homework he had to do in kindergarten. Frankly, I think the kid had a point. What ever happened to childhood? Anyway, Ferris was sort of tripping over the line from protest into rebellion: "I'm just not going to do this homework. It's too much! I quit."

 

My son put his hand on his child's shoulder and said, "I understand, Ferris. Just go in tomorrow and tell your teacher it was too much and that you decided to quit." And then my son and I walked off. About twenty minutes later we passed the dining room table again and Ferris was hard at work on his homework. It was almost completed. And my son, with a grin, said to me, "Dad, this Love and Logic stuff is just too easy."

 

Thanks for reading! Our goal is to help as many families as possible. If this is a benefit, forward it to a friend.

 

Dr. Foster Cline

 

 

*** It is not always this easy! Make sure you have "deposited" into your child's "account" by providing many choices throughout the day! The more the better. Your child is going to be more willing to listen when they feel in charge and responsible!

GOING BANANAS!

Our banana is really starting to change! Students have had an eye-opening experience with this experiment. Observing the changes in our banana after several days, students have used their background knowledge of how to recycle and our previous work with the compost to connect and further develop their understanding of decomposition. Students are having to use their five senses to explore and investigate these changes closely.

 

 Something easily observable is the change in color as our banana is now black and oozing with liquid. The smell is more intense and to touch, the banana is squishy and full of liquid! Watch out! It even squirts "banana juice!"

Using descriptive language to describe feelings, relate experiences, and communicate comprehension is part of the standards that need to be addressed in preschool. Looking closely at the student's reaction and facial expressions below, he had no difficulty communicating those to the teacher!  "I don't want to touch it!"

Science Experiments

To further explore natural science, students have been conducting an observational experiment involving change. After watching an episode of Sid The Science Kid on change, we decided to see what would occur to a banana. To start, students discussed a banana. What it feels like, tastes like, looks like, and smells like. We measured the banana so that we could observe any changes in the length. Students are all familiar with bananas and had a great time predicting what might happen to the banana in a few days.

After a few days we discovered many changes occurred. The banana was no longer bright yellow and firm. This soft and brown banana didn't seem as "yummy" to the kids. We talked about how you can still enjoy bananas like the one below in banana bread.

The next experiment also involved a fruit and can be done at home! Students are growing their own avocado plant. What a great way to talk about the life cycles of plants.  So... how can we grow an avocado plant? Follow the steps below at home to conduct your own avocado experiment with your child.

Get a soft ripe avocado
Clean off fruit
Cut ends off pit / seed
Wrap in wet paper towel
Enclose in container put in dark cool place 2-4 weeks
Watch for pit to crack open (1 week)
Watch for Root to start growing (2 weeks)

What a great lesson in discovery! As you can see some students had different reactions.

Look carefully and you can see the start of our new avocado root. We can keep the cycle going!

LIVING LOVE AND LOGIC TIP #14

Swearing Student Proves No Sweat for Love and Logic Teacher
Weekly Tip from the Love and Logic^® Experts

 

I was recently blessed to hear a wonderful story…a tale of a teacher using Love and Logic with a student who called her a vulgar name. Although shocked and hurt, her Love and Logic training paid off. "Ohhhhh, this is not good," she replied. "You must be having a rough day. We'll talk about this later."

 

Perplexed by her calm response, the student grunted, "Huh?"

 

He was escorted to the office where he awaited his fate. "This is between you and your teacher," the principal told him. "She'll visit with you after school. Your mom will pick you up afterwards."

 

During their meeting, the teacher described some options for solving the problem. These included meeting with the school resource officer and paying a fine for disorderly conduct, in-school suspension, or helping her with "community service" tasks around the school.

 

He opted for helping her out. After working with her for two weeks, he realized that she really wasn't what he’d called her. They developed a positive relationship…and there was no more name calling that year!

 

To learn more about building positive teacher-student relationships, read Jim Fay's new book, Creating a Love and Logic School Culture.

 

Thanks for reading! Our goal is to help as many families as possible. If this is a benefit, forward it to a friend.

 

Dr. Charles Fay

 

 

* As parents, we too can remain calm when our little ones use hurtful words. What a great way to teach them about control and forgiveness!

Learning Letters

According to Educational Theorist Howard Gardner, there are several different ways that a student can learn. Gardner has 8 basic types of intelligence that he believes students learn through. Gardner's theory argues that students will be better served by a broader vision of education, wherein teachers use different methodologies, exercises and activities to reach all students. The 8 intelligences are:

• Spatial
• Linguistic
• Logical-mathematical
• Bodily-kinesthetic
• Musical
• Interpersonal
• Intrapersonal
• Naturalistic

Children learning at HO4K are fortunate that these 8 intelligences are addressed everyday through activities provided by the teachers. Below are just a few pictures and examples from this week of how students worked with the letter N.

(logical-mathematical,)

Lentil has the letter "Nn" in the middle. Ms JoAnn read a magazine article about how nutritious they are and decided to serve them in the meat sauce with our spaghetti (naturalistic). The children noticed them right away and were good sports about trying them! We made a math graph to chart who refused, who said yes, or no thanks I didn't like them but I'll try them next time.



(Intrapersonal, Bodily-kinesthetic)

 

 Nickel starts with the letter N. Students revisited coins and sorted them accordingly. We learned about listening for the N sound at the beginning, middle and end of words (linguistic). After students sorted the coins, we took the nickels and made wishes as we tossed them into a wishing well (interpersonal).

(Spatial, Bodily-kinesthetic)

 Lastly, students practiced forming the letter N with noodles! Students loved tracing the uppercase and lowercase letter N's with glue and then placed noodles on top. This is just another way to reinforce letter recognition and formation.